What do you want to be when you grow up?

They asked, what do you want to be when you grow up?
A doctor, a lawyer? 
I remember the question.
My Dad asked me regularly.
What do you want to be when you grow up?
I didn’t know then, and I have an idea now.

I think a better question would be, WHO do you want to be when you grow up?
Who do you want to be? 

We often don’t know WHO we are, and we are supposed to know WHAT we want to be for the rest of our lives.
When did you figure out who you were?
Not who people told you you were, but WHO you actually are….

Have you figured it out yet? I suspect most of us, have egos that tell us we are this and we are that,
And if we look deeper, there’s somebody else lurking behind the curtain. 
I implore you to go shake hands, share a hug, and warm cup of something. 

WHO you are is much more important than WHAT you do,
And I never remember my Dad asking me that. 
Likely because he already knew I was bomb as fuck,
And there was a missed opportunity.

To reflect, to journal, to get to the bottom of what my future self could, ought, should, might just WANT to be…

Ask me that question now…
What do you want to be when you grow up Crystal?
And my answer would be wise.

I want to acquire and gain knowledge to better understand myself and the world around,
The world I’m connected to, but often don’t realize.
I want to share what I know with the women who come after me, and learn form the women who came before me. 
I want to see how everything and everyone is connected, and help everyone else understand the very same thing.
I want to share my wisdom and love and joy and self with every and all who come to the altar. 
I want to be wise.

Ask me that question again…
What do you want to be when you grow up Crystal?
And my answer would be wild.

I want to be wild like the wind, blowing across oceans, uprooting trees, and lulling babes to sleep,
I want to be wild like the ocean, rivers, and streams caring for the plants, and the earth, and the animals, nourishing them, feeding them, carving into the earth with my immense power, tumbling and turning across the vast planet, and soft and serene while slipping down a mountain vista, 
I want to be wild like fire, destruction and rebirth, swathing across lands and engulfing all that there is, clearing new paths for rebirth and regrowth, purging out the old, and making way for the new,
I want to be wild like the Earth, grinding and grooving, influencing all others, creatures, humans, wind, and water, feeding, nourishing, making a home for all that are here, showing a synchronicity, and depth of wonder and inspiring adventure, and exploration. 
I want to be wild. 

I don’t know WHAT I want to be. I know what I am. 

I am a mother, and a wife, I am an athlete and a writer, I am a lover and dancer, I am a feeler and a thinker, I am passion and desire, I am fierce and protective, I am love. 

I know WHO I want to be. 
And armed with the knowledge of WHO I am, not worse, nor better, 
And a clear vision of who I want to be in the future, I continue to walk the path. 

The path towards that wise, wild, woman.
The one that gathers.
The one that supports.
The one that loves. All.
That wise, wild, woman.

Drop a message in the comments, if you’d like to come gather with me in circle ♥️